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Tuesday, April 8, 2008

My Family Has A Monopoly on Crazy

When some people talk about their "crazy family", what they really mean to say is that their family is wacky and a little weird, but fun. When I say that my family is crazy, I mean just that. They're certifiable. I won't go into the details.

Two years ago, I spent some time working on my genealogy. I spoke with aunts and grandparents and wrote down many of their stories. As it turns out, I come from a long line of people with real issues. These people cultivated their issues, were attracted to and then married other people with issues and gave birth to generations of issue-holders. Perhaps my posterity will thank me for nothing other than marrying a genuinely normal person and trying to breed out some of the issues, or dilute some of the crazy in my blood. My sister is also en route to doing the same thing. There may still be some hope for our family genes.

My parenting philosophy basically boils down to "Don't Be Crazy". This seems straightforward, but can be harder than you think, if you're from a crazy family. Before opening my mouth or following a particular course of action, I have to ask myself "Would my parents have done or said this?" If the answer is "yes", then I probably shouldn't do it. Its probably a crazy thing to do.

So here's to all of you who are survivors of crazy families. Try not to be crazy too.

3 comments:

Ms. Jones said...

Great post. It made me laugh. Good to know I'm not the only one who comes from a bunch of nuts.

LAR Girl said...

So funny! And true of my family too. My family is so messed up that I am considered the neat, organized and normal one, LOL!

We've got mental illness, affairs, abuse and on and on in my family's history and I feel too that it must stop with me.

My mother actually believes that the women in our family are cursed and cannot stay married or avoid having affairs. My great grandmother was with 10 different guys and had children with each of them and this was early in the 20th century in a very religious country that didn't allow divorce and possibly still doesn't.

Depression and mental illness and abuse on that side, same on my dad's side . . . add some bizarre theories on food and medicine, abandonment issues and emotional constipation and you've got a whole lotta superdysfunctional insane in the membrane craziness. So when someone in my family says, "Don't be crazy," they mean it literally too.

I feel really lucky that I married into a fairly normal family. At least the parents love their kids and want to be around them and have never abandoned them or belittled them. They are very supportive and I am so grateful that I married Beau Brummel.

Nancy Ross said...

I totally agree, Opal*q - Flashlight has been my saving grace.